No Substitute

There is no substitute for these amazing world changers surrounding me.

My investment in them is immeasurable.

We have laughed until we can't breathe at inside jokes.

We have cried as loss, casually and indiscriminately, takes someone from our lives.

We have hurled words of anger in the heat of the moment, out loud, or under our breath.

We have taken back those same words in repentant realization that we didn't mean it, that nothing is worth hurting those you are closest to.

We have watched in wonder as one of us grows closer to Jesus through sacrifice and prayer.

No one can replace the fiercely loyal and joyously abandoned love we have for each other.

We have traversed miles upon miles over mountains, deserts, snowy plains, and beaches....

Around the globe, hearing various languages, seeing different nationalities.

We have worshiped with brothers and sisters we didn't know we had, until we met...with only Christ as our common denominator.

I'm so very thankful to begin yet another year with my family at my side.

And I'm on their side.

As we are on the Lord's side.

Doing life together.

Until God calls us Home.

Sssshhh....it's a secret.

(I also posted this for the Joli blog today, so if you've already visited there and read this, my apologies.)

The other day, my son, Drummer Boy, told me something funny. You know, the cute stuff kids say when they’re the ripe old age of seven-almost-eight.

“Wait, repeat that!” I told him while grabbing my phone to capture this moment for posterity.

“No,” he replied nonchalantly.

“What? Why not?” I asked, phone in my hand, ready to win this round.

“Because, you’re going to put it on Facebook or something, and I don’t want it to be where everyone can see it,” he stated, bluntly, and innocently forcing me to re-think my integrity as a parent.

Long story short, I didn’t post it to Facebook, the internet, or my blog.

It was left between Drummer Boy and myself.

A moment.

One of a series of moments that make up the story of our life together.

A moment that will be shared with his dad, his sister, his grandparents.

But not with random strangers he doesn’t know.

There is an entire blog I could devote to the subject of how fine a line there really is between sharing cute stuff your children do, and exploiting them for entertainment. But this is not that blog.

I saw something in what my son said that spoke to the very heart of why I do ministry, and what motivates my teaching.

How often do I take something God told me in the Secret Place and use it in a teaching or a song?

Too many to count, really.

Nothing wrong with that, right?

Usually....no.

Unless, God wanted to speak to my heart a secret for only me.

A secret no one else should know right now.

Many times in Jesus’ ministry He did a miracle, or revealed a secret about Himself, and then would say, “Tell no one.”

The shepherds ran to the manger and saw the Baby Jesus. They knew He was the Messiah, they heard the angels’ song, heard the angelic proclamation. They left the stable to tell everyone that Jesus was born.

What did Mary do?

“But Mary kept all these things and pondered them in her heart.” (Luke 2:19)

Sometimes, God gives us secret things to treasure and ponder in our heart.

God promised me my husband would come back to his first Love again.

Biker Man was angry at God. After the death of our son, he wanted nothing to do with ministry, or even deeper relationship with Jesus. He didn’t even know he was mad at God, actually.

I knew. And so many times over the next several years, I wanted to tell him, to show him how wrong he was in his response.

But the Holy Spirit said, “Be quiet. Say nothing. Stay out of it. This is his wrestling match with the Almighty. Before it’s over, I will touch him and his walk will never be the same.”

(for another story like this, read Genesis 32:22-32.)

So I bit my tongue, prayed more, and in the process of pondering, learned my husband’s love language in a way I never would have, had I blabbed my word from the Lord.

And now, he walks with a limp.

I’m in awe of the overwhelming power of the love of our Heavenly Father.

He will keep His promises.

He will fulfill His Word.

He is faithful.

And sometimes, we have to keep it a secret.

Ponder it, pray over it, and wait in patience for the promise to be fulfilled.

It is so worth the wait.

Ellie's Birthday

Here are some pictures from Ellie's birthday party a couple weeks ago.

I know, I know, long time between posts.

Well, we are currently in Dallas, Texas, at Christ For the Nations.

Busy busy. So I think I'm doing pretty well, considering.

As guests arrived, they wrote in a small book some advice or encouragement for Ellie's tenth year.

I put the book in a small suitcase with a note,
"Please write a note to the birthday girl. Thank you!"

Guests served themselves from the snack table using these cones I made from scrapbook paper, twine, and hot glue.

Drinks were served from a BIG Mason jar in little Mason jars.

I set up a photo booth on on end of the playroom.

I got these blackboard birds on a string at World Market, and wrote "P H O T O" on them.

Cute, right?

Some of the photobooth backdrop. Paper flowers with buttons, paper birds, and hearts strung on twine.

With the girls.

(They had an old trunk with boas, aprons, beads and dresses to choose from, and an old hat box with hats I've collected from the 30's 40's, etc.)

Silly pose.

Me, Nichole, & Teresa. I love these ladies!

Ellie's little cousins.

Each girl made her own flower headband using fabric scraps, lace, buttons, and a hot glue gun (which I operated, I'm aware burnt fingers are a sure fire way to get branded worst birthday party ever!).

Ellie's Papa (Biker Man's dad) placed a prayer shawl over her and prayed a blessing for her birthday, as we all gathered around in agreement.

Then we released balloons with glow bracelets inside them.

It's really hard to see here, but they looked pretty cool.

I think next time, we'll use fatter glow sticks, rather than the skinny bracelets.

Drummer Boy helped her open gifts.

Even when she wasn't asking for his help.

He's sweet that way.

And that's pretty much it!

Ellie's friend, Katy, stayed the night because as a fellow homeschooler, she was the only one who could take off Monday.

I set up a tent in the living room with twinkle lights, and they camped out there.

obviously, I had the flash on, but, you get the idea.

Happy Birthday, Ellie girl!!!

Back In Town

Ellie took this picture with her ipod.

Her ipod.

I remember when I got my first camera, at the ripe old age of 13.

It didn't take pictures this clear.

Or this:

She took this over the summer in Colorado.

My daughter amazes me.

We have been constantly ministering, being gone on the road, in a different town every day, sleeping in a different bed every night.

She never complains.

I guess it's an adventure for both Ellie and Drummer Boy.

They get to meet new people, and see God transform lives, while experiencing all sorts of new sights, sounds, smells and cultures.

And that's just going to other States in the U.S.A.

Wait until they get out of the country.

It's going to be awesome.

We are carriers of God's glory, to cover the earth with His presence.

Keep us in your prayers. We have a fundraiser this Saturday to raise money for No Compromise International, our new God-planned ministry. Vance will be going to Kenya in January, Mexico and Guatemala in March, and all four of us will be going to Papua New Guinea and Australia in April.

I can't wait to see what pictures Ellie decides to take then.

It's so exciting!

A favorite new poem I had never seen before.

This is my new favorite poem.

I read it to Ellie last night as we were side by side, laying on the couch.

When I first saw it, my breath actually caught in my throat.

In case you can't read the above, here it is in easier to read format:

You are the trip I did not take;

You are the pearls I could not buy;

You are my blue Italian lake;

You are my piece of foreign sky.

You are my Honolulu moon;

You are the book I did not write;

You are my heart's unuttered tune;

You are a candle in my night.

You are the flower beneath the snow;

In my dark sky a bit of blue,

Answering Disappointment's blow

With "I am happy! I have you!"

The author? Anne Campbell.

I love it.

It reminds me of my children each time I read it.

And how I should treasure them as "the book I did not write".

God is the Author of their story, I am merely a steward entrusted with their care.

And a look in their eyes, faces smiling, full of trust and unwavering love, makes me certain of my calling as a Mom.

God has anointed me for this before any song grew in my thoughts, or fell from my lips.

Two And A Half Weeks Later

I know, I know.

I have been gone from the blog world for over two weeks.

Again, living life with no time to blog about it.

That's a good thing. For me, anyway.

We have commenced school, Master's Commission (XMC),

and getting back into the flow at Crossroads.

So much has been happening, but the BIG news on the home front is:

We are launching a full-time ministry!

I will devote an entire post to this later on.

Most recently, Drummer Boy lost another tooth.

Here is the video I did of this monumental occasion.

(Disclaimer: Drummer Boy's method for tooth-pulling was not my first choice. It was something he had heard about and wanted to try. Could not talk him out of it.)

Since We've Been Gone...

A LOT has happened.

I mean, a lot.

When last I wrote, we were preparing for a weekend worship seminar with our friends

Worship pastors Marty and Amy Gonzales:

It went awesome.

The entire weekend was amazing.

I taught two workshops the Saturday morning, one of which was a songwriting session. They wrote a song, "Heaven Is Falling." I loooved being part of the process as God poured through their worship team. We introduced the song during the Saturday night worship service, and then again to their church body on Sunday morning. The entire church really embraced the song.

God spoke the entire weekend. Not just during the services, which were refreshing and real. We were ready to hear what the Holy Spirit wanted to say. And He spoke.

We can't wait to go back.

Before leaving for Tulsa we took a couple days to see the Colorado Rocky Mountains...

Can I just say...WOW.

Ellie enjoying the view.

A lake. A beautiful, pristine, clear, probably freezing, lake.

Again. WOW.

Biker Man and Drummer Boy.

Ellie made a snowball. A snowball. In July.

Ellie also took this well composed photograph of Biker Man and myself.

We saw elk.

Up close.

Of course, Biker Man bemoaned the fact that we had obviously arranged a Colorado trip at the wrong time of year. He loves to hunt, and was understandably bitter the remainder of the afternoon.

Our smiles prove we had no idea that in two days we would be in 106 degree heat.

Which is another blog.

Home For A Whole Week!

Yep, the title says it all!

We're home to do laundry, finish up school, and catch our breath before embarking yet again on another two weeks of singing, loving on folks, and just enjoying the presence of God with other members of His family!

I am so proud of Ellie. Once we realized she had fallen behind in Math due to unforeseen band practices earlier this year, she made up her mind to finish before the second leg of our summer journey. Once home, she proceeded to do eight lessons a day in Math. With each lesson containing at least twenty questions, plus tutorials, the total per day was....well, I'll let you do the Math. I'm tired.

Needless to say, we are working on everything we didn't finish before we left in June, mainly the extra room, which is almost done!!! Yes!!

My dear friend, Emily commissioned me to do a painting for a friend of hers, with excerpts from a poem written for her friend's son, who is autistic. I based the painting around the theme of the poem: God created the stars, one was struggling to keep up with the other stars in the sky, so God found a home where it would be nurtured.

At first, I thought the bird represented how the star came to be home, but the more I worked on it, I saw the bird representing this amazing woman raising her son amid doctors' reports, the day to day frustrations, and incredible obstacles, but finding a way to keep her star in the sky, not allowing him to fall. On her tail feathers hangs a lantern, lighting the way for the rest of us to find inspiration and wisdom from her journey.

I will post a picture of the finished painting soon.